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TRANSCRIPT of Episode 163: "Adult Entertainment Theater - 5 Star Review"



Review That Review with Chelsey & Trey
Episode 163: "Adult Entertainment Theater - 5 Star Review"

Transcription


*Please pardon any and all spelling errors!



[00:00:00] CHELSEY DONN: Follow the fucking rules!



[00:00:03] THEME SONG: Everybody's got an opinion.

Every Californian and Virginian.

It's so hard to tell who to trust and who to ignore.

Someone's gotta settle the score.

Trey and Chelsey will help you choose!

Whose views win, which ones lose.

Online haters are comin' for you!

Baby, it's time to Review That Review!



[00:00:33] CHELSEY DONN: Hello?

[00:00:36] TREY GERRALD: and hello listeners, welcome to Review That Review, we are the podcast that is dedicated to reviewing,

[00:00:44] CHELSEY DONN: Reviews!

[00:00:46] TREY GERRALD: that's Chelsey

[00:00:47] CHELSEY DONN: And that's Trey Gerald.

[00:00:48] TREY GERRALD: but together, just call us,

[00:00:50] VOICEOVER: The Review Queens,

[00:00:54] CHELSEY DONN: That's right. And on this beautiful summer's day Trey, I can't imagine what might be on your chest. Would you like to?

[00:01:02] VOICEOVER: Lodge a complaint,

[00:01:04] CHELSEY DONN: Can you imagine what might be on my chest?

[00:01:05] TREY GERRALD: I, yeah, Chelsey has brought back her beautiful nude beach tatas shirt, yes, okay, so, thank you for giving me the platform,

[00:01:15] CHELSEY DONN: Oh

[00:01:18] TREY GERRALD: add to the ledger of complaints, I hate the whole social construct of good and bad posture. If hunching over feels good for me, why is it bad? I understand, we've all seen those very old people that like literally are like a 90 degree angle and I recognize like, I mean, I think we're all gonna end up there because now everyone has a computer, everyone is hunched over, I mean, that's why we have ergonomic chairs and desks and all the stuff, but like having bad posture It's like a choice, and I understand that maybe it's like, you know, you could make a better choice. There's just so much negative attention on people's posture, and I don't like the negative connotation, because it feels better for me to, like, give my lower back a little bit of a break and, like, have my shoulders hunched a little bit, and maybe I'm going to pay for that when I'm in my 90s, but standing erect and having good posture doesn't feel good. So why does, why does good posture feel bad, but bad posture feels good. That's my complaint. I hate it. I need you all to get on board with me. Chelsea, talk posture.

[00:02:29] CHELSEY DONN: my goodness. I've had pretty bad posture most of my life. I got to say as cliche as it might sound, Pilates really helped me a lot when I started doing Pilates. I literally went from like five five to five six and a half just based on posture alone.

[00:02:45] TREY GERRALD: What does that mean? your height.

[00:02:48] CHELSEY DONN: Yes.

[00:02:49] CHELSEY DONN: That's a lot of slumping over, but I agree. I mean, I think it's the computer.

[00:02:54] CHELSEY DONN: I think there's just so many factors that make us sort of like, you know, slunch like that. And I guess it's just like, it's like anything else, right? It's like people that are going to correct your grammar or in an unnecessary way. I mean, we're, this is a podcast where we're.

[00:03:09] TREY GERRALD: never done that. Mm-Hmm.

[00:03:10] CHELSEY DONN: We're paid to correct grammar, right Trey?

[00:03:12] CHELSEY DONN: But other than that, like it's like the grammar police or we call my brother in law the sane police, the posture police, You know, like I don't need, No, I'd be how I want to be The posture, I'm working on it because I recognize that while it is uncomfortable temporarily, it does actually take pressure off my lower back, it's just like, I have to think about it, so I have a new connotation with it, but I totally hear you, I just, you don't want anyone telling you how you should stand, that you're standing wrong, mind your business, mind your P's and Q's, okay?

[00:03:46] TREY GERRALD: I just wish it felt better.

[00:03:47] CHELSEY DONN: Agree,

[00:03:48] TREY GERRALD: easier to have good posture. That's

[00:03:50] CHELSEY DONN: right, yeah, you definitely have to be mindful, like even right now, I'm like, okay, activate my wings, like, okay,

[00:03:57] CHELSEY DONN: right.

[00:03:57] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah. Right, but I hear you. Valid complaint. You slouch all you want to slouch, Trey.

[00:04:03] CHELSEY DONN: You're never gonna hear me complaining about your posture.

[00:04:07] CHELSEY DONN: You're welcome.

[00:04:08] CHELSEY DONN: Yes. 

[00:04:08] TREY GERRALD: why don't we tackle an online review?

[00:04:10] CHELSEY DONN: Let's get a little more comfortable, shall we?

[00:04:14] VOICEOVER: Review That Review,

[00:04:18] CHELSEY DONN: As your trusty Review Queens, We bring in reviews from the internet that we feel need to be inspected.

[00:04:24] TREY GERRALD: We read you a review. We break it down. We rate the impact of that review on a scale from zero to far. Crowns. It's a really regal process that we call,

[00:04:33] VOICEOVER: Assess That Kvetch,

[00:04:35] CHELSEY DONN: That's right. Mm hmm,

[00:04:38] TREY GERRALD: you've got such a doozy,

[00:04:39] CHELSEY DONN: I,

[00:04:39] TREY GERRALD: be multi parts, so,

[00:04:42] CHELSEY DONN: is a multi, yeah, this is a multi parter,

[00:04:44] TREY GERRALD: let us know, what are we tackling today?

[00:04:47] CHELSEY DONN: All right, so this week I have a listener submission, and it is from my roommate, if you guys remember back in, uh, several episodes ago, we had Scott G., I nominated as my Royal Highness, Because my roommate had written, or housemate rather, had written a review about the plumbing service, A1.

[00:05:09] CHELSEY DONN: Do we remember Scotchy? He goes by Scotchy, that's not his real name. So Scotchy texted me, last night actually, and said that we had to read this. Sexy review, you guys, for Tiki Adult Theater, Inc. The Tiki Theater in East Hollywood is Los Angeles last standing adult theater. Patrons describe the 30 seat theater about the size of four parking spaces as a refuge. and Magical. The theater is run by a Salvadorian immigrant and former battlefield nurse who has found deep appreciation for the place. That's according to the LA Times. Now on the Yelp page, it says the mini theater was opened on November 5th of what year? 1969, with an adult movie titled Studio F. It was later renamed Tiki Theater after the demise of the Sunset Pussycat Theater. This is the only theater showing straight porn in the greater metropolitan Los Angeles area. Screening video DVD on a very small screen, it originally had girls stripping between triple features. But no longer, it may also be the last theater in Los Angeles with a turnstile entrance as well. It was a conversion of a former market and later a liquor store and has operated as an adult theater for over 50 years.

[00:07:02] CHELSEY DONN: Whoo,

[00:07:05] TREY GERRALD: Tiki.

[00:07:18] CHELSEY DONN: on Yelp has a 3. 8 overall and only 20 reviews, but there was so much gold here There's so much I'm gonna talk about on patreon that I just I know that we mark all of our episodes as explicit And this is gonna be explicit, but It goes really explicit and so I'm gonna save that behind the paywall or behind the porn wall or in that like back area of the blockbusters that had a curtain so you have to get behind that curtain if you want to see what's coming on the after show, pun intended.

[00:07:48] CHELSEY DONN: However, I did just want to read Quickly try I know like this is a little unconventional a shorter one star review that I think gives a little bit of context of The place and then I'm gonna go into the main review So I'm doing a twofer but here we go this review or a threefer I guess this review I add triple feature as they say this review is written by D D D D L, and it says I'll make this short, 14 bucks to get in for a four hour limit, two pornos playing at the same time, one on a huge projector scree, the other on a television, very dark and dingy and nut loads all over the seats, do not sit down, my friend made me and I feel really filthy, go at your own risk. So that's

[00:08:39] CHELSEY DONN: Dee Dee Lee. Oh, not loads, sweetie. So it's, I mean, that's what I mean. It gets really, really blue in the after show. That's just a little tease. And, and you're going to hear this next review as well. We can crown this review or not. This is really for context.

[00:08:52] TREY GERRALD: is not the theater that Pee Wee Herman was arrested in, is it?

[00:08:56] CHELSEY DONN: This was not the theater that Pee Wee Herman was arrested in, however, Trey, I'm glad you brought that up, There is an arrest that does take place with a celebrity at this theater, and I'm also gonna talk about that in the after show, So, there's a lot of juice over there, go on to, eww, gross!

[00:09:16] TREY GERRALD: Loads Juice,

[00:09:18] CHELSEY DONN: Go on over to

[00:09:31] TREY GERRALD: Alright, that was good, context, Ry Anne,

[00:09:45] CHELSEY DONN: So, yeah, Rye, yeah, Anne, I guess, A N N, F, this is a five star review.

[00:09:51] TREY GERRALD: an unnecessary N, like Don, or an unnecessary

[00:09:55] CHELSEY DONN: okay, okay. All right, I guess we both have that. All right, so here we go. This is Rye and F's five star review, and this was written, by the way, within the last year, so this theater is very much still alive and kicking. Sorry before I get started. I just want to say on the Yelp page under like Amenities and more.

[00:10:17] CHELSEY DONN: Okay,

[00:10:18] CHELSEY DONN: and I just want to point out that this page has not been claimed But under amenities and more it says classy, 

[00:10:24] TREY GERRALD: What?!

[00:10:30] CHELSEY DONN: lot, and TV. Okay, so just keep that in mind as I read this review. Classy. Ryan F. Okay, so, first of all, since I'm a parent, don't believe the good for kids mark, some pedo probably put it's an adult theater, plain and simple, but honestly, this is my home away from home, haven't had a chance to make out there in about a year, but I was a regular for a long time, I don't gossip about my past on any type of internet service, what I will say is there's days with mellow mind, their own business people,

[00:11:08] CHELSEY DONN: There's bad days where you have some bad B.

[00:11:11] CHELSEY DONN: O.

[00:11:12] CHELSEY DONN: or some loud obnoxious individuals. There's days where vibes are just on point. I have met some of my best friends there. If you're single looking for something new to experience, if you're curious, adventurous, or freaky, couple, or individual, go enjoy yourself. I recommend don't bring a girl if you're gonna be jealous and greedy. But shout out to the owners. They're due as fuck. I love them. The first time or so they might seem a bit dickish, but they're awesome. Once you get to know them, you gotta understand new face in a deviant getaway theater. They gotta watch themselves and make sure you're not going for drama or anything that's gonna put a negative light on the business. So keep them open minds as well, relax, network, mingle with the willing. Don't harass the uninterested, be polite, follow the fucking rules, and you'll keep going back every chance you get, I just really feel at home there, Food, I never got a chance to try, With me being a Vagetarian and all,

[00:12:34] CHELSEY DONN: You'd be surprised by how many greedy men go and the poor girl dying, because I'm praised for my smoked tube steak, But these guys wouldn't let them eat, so yeah, enjoy real review from a real ruthless motherfucker!

[00:13:00] TREY GERRALD: Oh, my God. Wait, I'm. Wait, it's unfortunate because I wish that some of the spelling grammar would have been more on par because I actually appreciate A point that I think being sex positive

[00:13:17] CHELSEY DONN: yeah. Mm hmm, mm

[00:13:19] TREY GERRALD: appreciate the distinction that Ryan F makes that like, yeah, there are good days.

[00:13:23] TREY GERRALD: There are off days. You got to understand like all walks of life are going to be here and like the experience can change from day to day, moment to moment. But then I feel like once we like get to the food section, like the review tapers off and doesn't make any sense. And, I also thought it was very, A.

[00:13:43] TREY GERRALD: Alarming to start with your review talking about a pedophile, but then also to

[00:13:48] CHELSEY DONN: but they're also saying like as a parent, like I'm like, ah,

[00:13:51] TREY GERRALD: to start with as a parent, and then say, This is my home away from home, the paradoxical nature of saying like, I'm a father, I also have a favorite home away from home, it's really like upending, I'm a

[00:14:05] CHELSEY DONN: right,

[00:14:06] TREY GERRALD: favorite home away from home, it's really like upending,

[00:14:08] CHELSEY DONN: mm hmm, I agree, like it felt like we had one review that had kind of like some grammatical errors that made it a little bit difficult to understand at times, but then we have this other review at the end, which do we want to talk about what it means? Because I have theories,

[00:14:23] TREY GERRALD: Right, well, I was thinking they were making a joke about being a vegetarian, haha, and then they

[00:14:28] CHELSEY DONN: yeah,

[00:14:28] TREY GERRALD: smoked meat, or whatever, the smoked sausage, like it's a

[00:14:32] CHELSEY DONN: well,

[00:14:33] CHELSEY DONN: I,

[00:14:34] CHELSEY DONN: Yes.

[00:14:35] TREY GERRALD: supposed to be like, she smokes the sausage because she's sucking dick, or something?

[00:14:39] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah, maybe. But like, I think that what they're saying, because they brought up earlier, they're like, don't bring your girlfriend unless you're like willing to share basically, or don't bring a girl if you're going to get greedy.

[00:14:50] TREY GERRALD: if a woman cannot go here on her own fucking accord, she has to be a prop or an implement to be

[00:14:55] CHELSEY DONN: No, I think they're saying a woman can go on their own accord,

[00:14:59] CHELSEY DONN: but that if you're going as a guy and you're like bringing your girlfriend and you're thinking that like other people are not going to be participating in your private affair, You have another thing coming, which we will discuss further in the after show in elicit detail,

[00:15:16] CHELSEY DONN: but that's me getting ahead of myself here.

[00:15:19] CHELSEY DONN: No pun intended. Anyway, I think that the last part is saying food. I never got a chance to try with my with me being a vegetarian. So I don't even eat the food because I'm just eating Vag, the entire time that I'm there. And I'm praise for my mom. I don't, it's like, I feel like it's something about the fact that like this girl, he has such a good dick that this girl is just going to be with him the whole time.

[00:15:47] CHELSEY DONN: But these other guys refuse to eat. A woman out, so they don't get any of it and they don't have a good dick, but that's on them. I'm just being real, motherfucker.

[00:15:56] TREY GERRALD: are ruthless, 

[00:15:58] CHELSEY DONN: Ruthless, right? Is that what that's saying?

[00:16:01] TREY GERRALD: guess, but I'm just confused. this was a theater,

[00:16:05] CHELSEY DONN: It's a movie theater, like they show porno. Yeah,

[00:16:09] TREY GERRALD: also like hook up and have sex acts there.

[00:16:11] CHELSEY DONN: that's definitely the, again, like, we will get more into this. That's why I read the first review, just to give you, like, a little bit of context of what's happening here. Like, there's two screens, there's two projectors, and the seats are covered with nut loads.

[00:16:26] CHELSEY DONN: Yes. This is technically a adult film theater, but there are illicit acts that are happening here and it is like a part of the culture. And if you go to the Yelp page and you read the reviews for yourself, like you will, at first I was like, is this a brothel? Is this a porn thing? Like that is very much the energy, the vibe.

[00:16:50] TREY GERRALD: Yeah, I mean, as a gay person, I understand.

[00:16:55] CHELSEY DONN: Again, they're like, if you're a girl, it sounds like if you're a girl and you like want to hook up, like just go there. And you will hook up.

[00:17:03] CHELSEY DONN: If you're a guy that wants to, you know, you know what I'm saying? Like, that's what we're talking about.

[00:17:06] TREY GERRALD: willing to participate.

[00:17:07] CHELSEY DONN: Correct. And if you're not, and I like the fact that this, that Ryan brings up, like, if there's somebody that seems like they're not interested, leave them the fuck alone.

[00:17:15] TREY GERRALD: Well, what's curious to me is Ryan has met some of their best friends there, so

[00:17:19] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah,

[00:17:20] TREY GERRALD: a bunch of Eiffel Towering?

[00:17:22] CHELSEY DONN: geez, maybe. I definitely think that it's, if you're meeting your best friends there, then again, not to suck shame in any way, but I think you guys have a common hobby.

[00:17:32] TREY GERRALD: I mean, it's interesting to me because that feels more progressive than I would think, like, a stereotypical straight man would be, like,

[00:17:37] CHELSEY DONN: Right.

[00:17:38] TREY GERRALD: not going to be engaging in sex acts with your friends. Like, know, like if you're sharing a girl or something, yeah. Or like, if you're going to watch dirty movies and masturbate at like bare minimum here, like

[00:17:50] CHELSEY DONN: Right. I

[00:17:51] TREY GERRALD: with your friend, right?

[00:17:52] TREY GERRALD: Or like, you're not going to look over and be like, Hey dude, where are you from? I

[00:17:56] CHELSEY DONN: think you are.

[00:17:58] CHELSEY DONN: And like, I, like, I, I think that that's the interesting thing about this place is like everyone, I mean, I don't know. I don't, I don't think that we need to get into a conversation about circle jerking, but I know that it's a thing. And I know, you know,

[00:18:12] CHELSEY DONN: I

[00:18:12] CHELSEY DONN: know it's like,

[00:18:14] CHELSEY DONN: right.

[00:18:14] TREY GERRALD: I mean, the whole context is different for me as a gay man, but like, also, to go up another notch here,

[00:18:20] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah,

[00:18:21] TREY GERRALD: Ryan also mentions, like, it's a great place to network. I'm just like, it's just like the executive for ABC, like,

[00:18:27] CHELSEY DONN: totally. Probably. Honestly, that's what it seems like.

[00:18:32] CHELSEY DONN: Hilarious. 

[00:18:33] TREY GERRALD: I also

[00:18:34] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah,

[00:18:35] TREY GERRALD: that Ryan described the owners as being dickish.

[00:18:39] CHELSEY DONN: I know, I love that too, but I thought that was also an interesting point, I'm sure they get to know their regulars

[00:18:46] CHELSEY DONN: and I can see a place like this being guarded and weird in the beginning because you just don't really know like what you're gonna get and that's why I do, like, even though I think Ryan takes it a little too far in the end there, it's a little odd, I appreciate what they're saying because it sounds like they, they are definitely in it for a certain reason, but they have respect for the place and for the, you know, Other people to go there and for the flexibility of the days and how my people might be.

[00:19:10] TREY GERRALD: And like, even in Key West, there's like a nude bar and there's also like male only places, you know, it is within the fence, it is sort of like

[00:19:19] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah,

[00:19:20] TREY GERRALD: with consent. So I don't feel judgmental about that for these straight people here. I think that's great. I feel like we could all be more evolved if we've, you know, didn't feel shame around sex.

[00:19:30] TREY GERRALD: But I will say a lot of, a lot of that is the value for me

[00:19:34] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah, I was gonna say like going through the talking points. I think that that is the value. I think there is a lot of new and unique information that I wouldn't know or that I would want to consider the spelling and grammar. Obviously, we had a lot of errors and things like that. It wasn't the best.

[00:19:50] CHELSEY DONN: I give it

[00:19:51] CHELSEY DONN: a C plus. Yeah.

[00:19:54] TREY GERRALD: think it got worse as it went on. I think Ryan's hands were busy.

[00:19:58] CHELSEY DONN: I think you're right.

[00:19:59] TREY GERRALD: Truthful shady.

[00:20:01] CHELSEY DONN: I think it's truthful.

[00:20:03] TREY GERRALD: pretty truthful. The only thing that's sort of glaring to me is like every man

[00:20:07] CHELSEY DONN: Mm hmm.

[00:20:08] TREY GERRALD: that if you have a really big dick, you don't have to talk about it. There's

[00:20:11] CHELSEY DONN: Right.

[00:20:12] TREY GERRALD: quoi, or like

[00:20:13] CHELSEY DONN: Sure. Unspoken. Right.

[00:20:15] TREY GERRALD: more you brag about it,

[00:20:17] CHELSEY DONN: Smaller ness.

[00:20:18] TREY GERRALD: how I feel. And like, same for like a fancy sports car. It's like, oh, they obviously have a small dick. Like you don't have to work so hard. So Ryan talking so much about possibly their huge cock

[00:20:28] CHELSEY DONN: Mmm, interesting. Making you think maybe they're not telling the truth. Interesting.

[00:20:33] TREY GERRALD: know. That's an interpretation.

[00:20:35] CHELSEY DONN: I gotta say, I liked the humility at the top. Like, I'm not an idiot. I'm not gonna tell you my illicit details on an online site.

[00:20:44] TREY GERRALD: Yeah. Like I, it's really the ending that like

[00:20:47] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah,

[00:20:48] TREY GERRALD: but like, I actually

[00:20:49] CHELSEY DONN: even then we're speaking in code, you know, like you'll see in the after show if you go, if you go on over there, that we're not exactly speaking in as much code, so this was definitely a much more coded language,

[00:21:01] TREY GERRALD: I mean, it's humorous. It is entertaining. I would imagine it feels to me like Ryan's point of view is letting you in as a newbie. This is

[00:21:12] CHELSEY DONN: right,

[00:21:13] TREY GERRALD: to like expect.

[00:21:14] CHELSEY DONN: yes,

[00:21:15] TREY GERRALD: that. And I do find that valuable and probably truthful. And so I do take them at their word that this is like a typical common experience.

[00:21:22] TREY GERRALD: And the commonality is that sometimes the vibes are off. But like, Be respectful, go in knowing this is the environment, If people are a little gruff, like, it's because you're new, like, You know, I do think this is a pretty strong review, honestly.

[00:21:35] CHELSEY DONN: agree, all right, should we go into the crowning?,

[00:21:38] TREY GERRALD: Let's crown Ryan, I'm curious.

[00:21:39] CHELSEY DONN: let's do it, okay,

[00:21:40] TREY GERRALD: so Chelsey and I each have our own set of zero to five crown cards, And in an effort to be fair and not influence one another, we will simultaneously reveal our ratings.

[00:21:49] VOICEOVER: The Queens are tabulating, Total Score, My Royal Highness, 

[00:21:57] CHELSEY DONN: Okay, I'm holding up three and a half crowns, Trey is holding up four crowns. Trey, you go first. Why four crowns for Ryan?

[00:22:02] TREY GERRALD: I almost did three and a half as well. It's funny. Ultimately, I think this review is doing a lot of good. I wish that the tone was a little different at the end. I also, like, have some nitpick ideas and thoughts throughout, but generally, I think this is useful. I think if you were interested in the Tiki Theater and you were, like, feeling a little gun shy about going, You would be able to extrapolate a lot of useful information from what Ryan is sharing and also like, hey, if you go and it happens to be like an off night, you cannot definitively say that your next trip will be that way.

[00:22:35] TREY GERRALD: And you should at least give it another try. And you're also hearing like you're going to get your dick wet. People are nice. You're going to meet friends and like, it's pretty open minded. And, you know, similarly to your point, like if you want to, if you're a girl and you want to hook up, you could go. I feel

[00:22:49] CHELSEY DONN: Yeah.

[00:22:49] TREY GERRALD: to deal with straight guys, Sexually, then maybe I could go.

[00:22:53] CHELSEY DONN: Mm hmm.

[00:22:53] TREY GERRALD: feels pretty useful. Um, sex positive. Why did you say three and a half? A half crown less.

[00:22:59] CHELSEY DONN: I think maybe because of the like spelling and grammar errors and the difficulty in the read, I guess. I thought it was above average. Above average? I thought there were a lot of really good points in here and that it was well executed until the end.

[00:23:14] CHELSEY DONN: And I think you really need to stick the landing for me to give you a four or above.

[00:23:18] CHELSEY DONN: So that was why I went with three and a half, but I do think that it was a good review and there was a lot of information and I appreciated the modesty and the ultimate impact is I know a little bit more of what I'm going into than before I read this review and I can make my own decision whether or not this place is for me or isn't

[00:23:37] CHELSEY DONN: in a way that doesn't feel so over the top crude, which I appreciate.

[00:23:41] TREY GERRALD: that too. I have a feeling on the after show we're gonna get

[00:23:43] CHELSEY DONN: Uh huh. Yes. Yes. Alright, well, we've done it, Trey, we've reached the most regal portion, the climax, if you will, of our show, Who Are You Inducting For? Mm hmm.

[00:24:00] TREY GERRALD: well, this is kind of funny because I didn't know the topic, but today I'm just being a little wholesome, being a little Betty Crocker. I cook like Donna Reed. I want to induct today, just the like joyfulness, sentimentality of this smell. of freshly baked cookies. I honestly feel like like we know that psychologically Disney does this where they like pipe in really good smells of like cotton candy and bullshit and whatever but like when I think of the experience of baking cookies Partially what first comes to me is like the aroma that like fills the house, fills the kitchen, like just cookie dough baking feels comforting, it feels really sweet, and it's like the excitement of like, oh, I'm about to have some good cookies, like nothing's better than a warm gooey cookie, not a soft cookie, I don't like soft cookies, I like

[00:24:47] CHELSEY DONN: No, no,

[00:24:48] TREY GERRALD: but I like the warm, like when you open it and like the chocolate chip starts gushing, like, Oh, I'm gushing, uh,

[00:24:56] CHELSEY DONN: mm hmm.

[00:24:57] TREY GERRALD: back.

[00:24:58] TREY GERRALD: Um, anyway, that's why I want to induct the smell of fresh baked cookies. That's just so fucking good. I love it. It makes me so happy. And that's why you're my Royal Highness.

[00:25:09] CHELSEY DONN: Whoo. I was gonna say like a, like a nice cinnamon bun. Like, Ooh, yeah. Like put a cinnamon bun in my oven. You know what I mean?

[00:25:15] TREY GERRALD: Yeah, ice it up, baby.

[00:25:18] CHELSEY DONN: Ice ice baby.

[00:25:20] TREY GERRALD: well, Queens, we did it. That is another round on the R U A R Q Ferris Wheel of Oh, my tiki is coming.

[00:25:28] CHELSEY DONN: Thank you for joining us today. If you like what you heard, if you're titillated by what you heard here today, please tell a friend.

[00:25:35] TREY GERRALD: If you did not like what you heard, tell an enemy and look back at our other bat catalog that isn't so titillated.

[00:25:42] CHELSEY DONN: That's right. On this week's After Show Pod, as I've been teasing for the entire episode, we are going to be rating and reviewing another five star Yelp review for Tiki Adult Theater written by Sam X.

[00:25:57] TREY GERRALD: no, the X makes me nervous. I wonder why this was said. I just, I don't know. Do bros sit around and jerk each other off? Like,

[00:26:07] CHELSEY DONN: I think it must be a thing. I like, again, don't want to sex shame anyone who this is their thing. Boy, oh boy, I wonder,

[00:26:17] TREY GERRALD: Well, Queens, please remember,

[00:26:20] CHELSEY DONN: you know what that is? You're a queen.

[00:26:24] TREY GERRALD: gender nonspecific, Limp Bizkit, Queen,

[00:26:28] CHELSEY DONN: Hopefully not Limp, hopefully Stiff Biscuit.

[00:26:30] TREY GERRALD: Limp Bizkit, that's when you circle jerk and you come on a cookie and someone, whoever comes last, has to eat it.

[00:26:36] CHELSEY DONN: Oh my god, ew, that's right. I forgot, I

[00:26:39] TREY GERRALD: Yeah, you knew

[00:26:40] CHELSEY DONN: forgot about, I did know that, but I forgot. I mean, I was thinking of the band, right?

[00:26:44] TREY GERRALD: wonder why they went with that name.

[00:26:46] CHELSEY DONN: My eyes have been,

[00:26:50] TREY GERRALD: Say it. Say it. 

[00:26:52] CHELSEY DONN: no, 

[00:26:53] TREY GERRALD: Bye, Queens!

[00:26:54] CHELSEY DONN: bye.

[00:26:55] TREY GERRALD: ha!

[00:26:57] VOICEOVER: Sign up directly on Apple Podcast to hear our weekly members only after show. Unlock additional benefits when you become a Patreon member@reviewthatreview.com slash patreon. Follow us on all the socials at the review queens and join our mailing list@reviewthatreview.com. Our kvetch line is open 24 7 at 1 8 5 0 review zero.

[00:27:16] VOICEOVER: You never visit, you never write. Give us a call now.

[00:27:21] CHELSEY DONN: Oh my goodness. Of course, I'm not going to finish that sentence, Trey. My mom might be listening. Let's go to the after show.

[00:27:27] TREY GERRALD: tell, yeah, Mommies, no listening to this episode.

[00:27:31] CHELSEY DONN: Yes. All right. See you on Friday, Queens.

[00:27:34] TREY GERRALD: In the words of J Lo, Let's get low,

[00:27:38] CHELSEY DONN: And go to www. reviewthatreview. com slash Patreon. See you Wednesday.




Review That Review is an independent podcast. Certain names have been redacted or changed to protect the guilty. Executive produced by Trey Gerrald and Chelsey Donn with editing and sound designed by me with voiceover talents by Eva Kaminsky. Our cover art was designed by LogoVora and our theme song was written by Joe Kinosian and sung by Natalie Weiss.


 

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